Dear Fat Santa

Dear Fat Santa,

Santa before we start

Don’t take offence. 

Things are going to get intense.

I am going to start…

PLEASE, don’t eat another tart.

Santa why is your tummy so big?

You are starting to look like a pig.

Mrs. Clause wants you to eat dinner,

But you need to get thinner.

Just eat a green bean

You will hopefully get lean.

Stop eating Krispy Kreme. 

You know being skinny is your dream.

You’re not going to fit in your sleigh.

So, you need to get fitter by next May.

Don’t fill my stocking with coal,

and don’t eat another sausage roll.

Happy Holidays Santa!

For Christmas, please get me some Coke

And some Fanta.

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